Advantages of A Belly

DISCLAIMER: Investing in a belly can subject you to type 2 diabetes mellitus, heart disease and added health risks. Please read this article with a sense of good humour and reunite with your sense of common and caution immediately after.

 

  1. To balance your coffee mug when you sit in a chair, but can’t be bothered to stretch your hand till the table.

 

  1. To hold your laptop at a perfect viewing angle when you can’t decide between sleeping and watching a movie after a long day. So, you do both.

 

  1. To make for a nice pillow- for your friends which can get annoying; but also for your partner/crush which will not be annoying and the closeness of which will lead to a nice amount “bonding” (wink, wink)

 

  1. To catch the toothpaste foam that invariably drips out of your mouth the moment you step away from the basin (dry floors FTW).

 

  1. So, you won’t have to work hard to hide your pregnancy. At least not until you get upgraded from a double decker to a triple decker.

 

  1. To cosplay as Laughing Buddha. All you need to do is take off your shirt. Ready for Halloween any day, anytime!

 

  1. To get rich during the holiday season- by playing Santa Claus. HO HO HO!

 

  1. To maintain a healthy distance between you and the Sweaty McSweatpants in front of you in the queue; so that you can come away with your sanity and your nose hairs intact.

 

  1. To play ping pong with against the wall when you’re bored enough to want a distraction, but not bored enough to dig out the ball from under the bed.

 

  1. So, you can put muffins to shame with your awe-inspiring muffin-top! Those muffins can sometimes get too puffed up for their own good…

 

  1. To feel that somehow incredible sense of satisfaction that you feel after you’ve had a smashing meal and you’ve collapsed into your bed like a ton of bricks for a well-deserved nap and your belly sticks out taut, but happily full.

 

 

  1. To be able to write listicles like this. After all, how else will you find out how efficient a cup holder and a toothpaste catcher and a laptop table a belly can be unless you have one?

 

  1. Oh and also! To laugh; because jiggling a jiggly belly makes you laugh which makes it jiggle more, so you laugh more which makes it jiggle even more… Calvin and Hobbes ROFL

 

 

Cheers!

Advertisements

2 thoughts on “Advantages of A Belly

  1. Blade runner says:

    And the most important: to be called as a moti by everyone you know and feel good for having gained some identity since you never had a worthwhile one! 😛

    Like

    • Ooha says:

      Hehe! But moti (fatso) has got to be the most ubiquitous identity ever. Everybody and their mother is called that, irrespective of their BMI, at some time or the other 😄

      Like

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s