One day…

24 hrs in a day…

1440 minutes in a day…

86400 seconds in a day…

But, really, one day is not so long…it’s short.

And getting shorter by the second.

 

When I set out today, 10 AM had just struck and I had a list of things to get done. Close my account at the bank, buy next month’s stock of pills, get a haircut…

Then, on my way out of the bank I slipped.

I remembered how out of breath I was by the time I made it up all those stairs that I was falling over now. I remembered the old man who was making his painstaking way up those same stairs in front of me. I remembered….nothing else, no more. Everything went dark and my eyes closed.

 

It felt like evening. I could sense the drop in temperature…just a little chill in the air and the heat of the tube light; dimness of the light and hints of shadows dancing around the edges…

It was 6 PM.

I glanced at the clock and then, at the prone figure lying in the bed in front of me. She was pale…very pale; and so familiar. I wracked my brains. I thought of everybody I knew. I stared and stared at her, silently willing her to open her eyes. I didn’t know why it was so important to me. But, it was. She had to open her eyes. She had to tell me who she was. She held the key to calming my beating heart. She was everything to me. But, I didn’t know why.

I got into the bed beside her, put my arms around her and whispered into her ear to hold on, to never let go, to hear my voice, to wake up.

It must have been 3 hours later, when I heard a new voice join mine. She was sitting beside the bed and clutching her hand to her chest. Through her tears, she was whispering all those things that I was until a few seconds ago. She had a kind of desperation in her; like she was on verge of a cliff that’s rapidly disappearing from under her feet.

I felt afraid. Intensely, absolutely and suddenly afraid. I felt like I was beside her on the verge of the cliff and I was falling before her. I wanted to throw my hand out, grab hold of her; at the same time, I knew I shouldn’t. I knew, irrevocably, somehow, that I shouldn’t. Because she would be safe even if I wasn’t and she should be safe.

I found myself beside her with my head in my lap, my tears staining the soft pleated cloth of her skirt. I found myself saying sorry over and over again. I found myself realizing why I’d wanted her to open her eyes so badly. I found myself realizing why I was scared. I found myself realizing that the person in that bed was me…

The time was 10.30.

 

24 hrs in a day…

1440 minutes in a day…

86400 seconds in a day…

But, really, one day is not so long…it’s short.

And for me, it was getting shorter by the second.

*END*

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